Monday, August 11, 2014

Turkey Sandwiches, Pancakes, and Caesar Salad

It started with a turkey sandwich. I’m not sure why it is always the little things, the turkey sandwich and not the turkey dinner, the pancake and not the cheesecake, lasagna and not pasta primavera, but it is always the simple foods that trip me up.

I had a long day at work today, one of those day where you shred 700 business cards, send out six versions of the same report because everyone has one small edit to make, and frantically trying to remember how to convert time zones so that you don’t turn in your homework late… again. I was going to treat myself to some cartoon cat bread. Don’t laugh, that is the actual name of an actual dessert served at our friendly Korean-owned fake-French bakery that specializes in weird hotdog and cheese-based pastries.

Anyway, I was looking for the cat bread, when suddenly I stopped. There, on a scrappy handwritten sign taped above a half-hearted refrigerator section were the characters 三明治, and I immediately felt a surge of homesickness.  There, hidden amongst the suspect tuna and egg salad was an actual turkey sandwich, and I needed to have it.

For a little context, turkey isn’t something Chinese people eat. Actually, I don’t think I’ve even seen turkey available anywhere in Chengdu before. There is lots of pork and chicken, some beef, heck even duck and yak are pretty common, but no turkey. And to be honest, I didn’t really mind. Turkey isn’t one of those things I commonly go out of my way for. Sure, I eat a couple of slices on Thanksgiving, maybe buy a package of lunch meat every so often, but that’s pretty much it.  So, I was surprised when I was suddenly seized by this absolute desire to eat this turkey sandwich that had definitely been sitting there, soaking in its own juices for several hours.

In the bakery, I picked up the little saran wrapped box. Thickly cut stale white bread, some sad iceberg lettuce, slimy tomatoes, something green… possibly cucumbers, a white substance I guess was either mayo or cheese, and then a few scraggly pieces of turkey. It didn’t even look appetizing then and there, but I still needed to have it.

I carried the box to the register, sadly forked over twenty-two kuai (roughly $3, and about ten kuai more than I would have paid for a good bowl of noodles), and ran back to my apartment. I unwrapped the box, tried not to drip, whatever was dripping off the sandwich onto my bed, and inhaled the entire thing.

It was terrible. I mean, beyond forgiveness bad. I’m not sure how a single sandwich can simultaneously be stale, dry, and soaking wet. I can’t tell you what it tasted like, except that it was bad. I have no idea if that white substance was supposed to be cheese or mayo, but it didn’t really taste like either. The tomato immediately launched itself off of the bread and onto my pants, and crumbs flew everywhere. It was gone in less than two minutes.

I don’t really know why I keep doing this to myself. Last week it was pancakes so laughably bad that I didn’t quite know what to do with them. The week before was some terrible Chinese approximation of a burger and fries. Don’t even get me started on Chinese ice cream…

I am perfectly content to eat Chinese food most of the time. I struggle a bit with breakfast here, but that’s because there isn’t a 油条place within walking distance of my apartment. I can choose from over five different hand-cut noodle places within a ten minute walking distance of the consulate. I have a list of classic Sichuanese dishes that I can order pretty much anywhere. And when that fails, point and pray usually works pretty well. The dumpling lady who works in my building may not know me by name, but she definitely knows my order.


So, why do I insist on eating over-priced poorly cooked Western food? I know it will be bad, I can see it coming from a mile away, and yet, sometimes I can’t stop myself. Again, its never the giant feast that trips me up, always the humble snack. It’s the brownie that reminds me of baking “from scratch” with my mother. It’s the salad that reminds me of all the times my little sister ate an entire bag of Caesar salad. It’s the cup of coffee that smells like home. 

I never feel more homesick than when I’m eating food that is just not quite the same as back home.

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